the classic one I had which was by far the most alarming went as follows:
I was sat in tower at an airfield (AG radio) and I got a call from a major airport controller asking me to tell all AC in the circuit to bugger off and any on the ground to stay put as he was talking a lost pilot in to our field. I did so and the bloke landed and taxied up to the apron. He got out and left all the lights flashing and brakes off. I thought he must be pissed up. In a brummy accent (which made a great tale greater) he told me that whilst on a solo x country of 15 mins he got lost and after an hour he had a near miss with an aircraft that came really close and waggled his wings. "i just waggled em back like" "there is some bloody idiots up there". I rang his flight school who were relieved he was down and not dead. They told me he busted Coventry, EMA, Birmingham (in the overhead) and Langar dropzoone. they asked if I would fly him back. Got to the plane with him and I asked why he was tiptoeing on the peddles. He said he did not know how to move his seatforward. It also turned out the reason he had to get ema to talk him down was coz he couldnt work out how to get even numbers on the radio! I took it to the fuel pump and it had f all fuel left and i mean FFF all. I let him fly it back to his base which he couldnt find. It turned out he had 75hrs and had only just gone solo, he owned an auster but crashed this in letouquet when he couldnt get the nose down coz his wife had a suitcase on her kneee in the back (i.e. the fuel went low so no weight in front), three in an Auster J1N to france??? not me thanks. I went a bit mad at his instructor for letting him go but after seeing the colour of his face (a whiter shade of white) I just went home.
Ahhh the joys. Never knew what happened...if any one recognises the story let me know the outcome.