Swish 266,
I think many of us have found ourselves in the same or a very similar situation to yourself over the years. I know it is of very little practical help to you I'm afraid, but I'm sure you are not alone & very many folk appreciate exactly what you are going through at present.
I can only reiterate what a number of other respondents to your original message have suggested.
Without wanting to sound too dramatic ,can I say, you only have one life & stess can unfortuately get you in the end. I fully appreciate your position, but there comes a time when you have to ask yourself, can I sensibly go on from here, or do I cut & run & accept the consequences, loss of salary & possibly career?
One post on here suggested, that you might continue on as best you can even for a short time, but as soon as you are in a position to get out, you are on your way. Also if you really must continue at present, set yourself a time limit, eg if things are still the same in six months, I am definitely going come what may. You may find by setting yourself some form of time limit or goal, you have something to look forward to.
I don't know if you are in BALPA & I appreciate you are working outside the UK, but would some contact with one of their Pilot Counsellors be worth a try.
However at some stage you may very well have to ask yourself, is it worth me carrying on, or do I take a completey different track?
Very best of luck & I hope things do work out for you.