several procedures to adhere to, including the 7 minutes that atc will expect me to adhere to (still very confused why this wasn't mentioned to me during atpl or during line training. But hey, found it in the wee yellow aerad book and was also told about it during my visit to scottish tma (absolutel awesome day btw))
Anyways, worst comes to worst, if i do absolutely nothing i'll expect to find a tornado/typhoon/F16 next to me. I'll give him a friendly wave, pull out my digital camera take some pikkies for the grandkids (when i eventually have them, obviously need kids first) and do whatever they want me to. Then call the relevant atc when on the ground and apologise profusely.
On a slightly more serious note, i will do both paragraphs 1 and 2, but i also have the phone numbers for london and scottish distress stored on my phone, and even over italy i'll call em up and we can sort something out.
Mods if you feel the next is innapropriate then feel free to delete it, however 2 very useful numbers for all pilots
1) London distress: 01895 426150
2) scottish distress 01292 682380
Put those numbers in your phones and use them if you need to.