You fool......you are trying to bring common sense into it, you must be squashed immediately.
Geez, you sound like me when I worked there.
Over the years I tried many times to get things like that going only to find out that somewhere in the wood pile some plick has his own agenda and behind your back the rug gets swiftly pulled out from under you and with no explanation to boot, in the end I just learnt to keep it to myself and just laugh at the child like behaviour.