Unfortunately it's simple:
Just work strictly to the book, even if the guy/gal is extremely nice on the other side of the phone, - , no sir, no can do, see OM-A blah,blah,blah
Take that extra ton every time you're not quite sure
Engine out taxi? - , no can do, , - big slope, short taxi, narrow turn
Full reverse every time, - , first exit, ROT, heavy plane
Discretion, - , how do you spell that, Sir?
ASR, ASR, ASR, ASR, ASR ................
Atchooooo, oh, - , dial 2
... sorry, I wanted to pick up the phone right away, but was on the other big white telephone, what was it again?
... oh, yeah, the handy was not on, because I get zillions of spam sms from Etisalat, by the way, does the company come up for those?
I'd like to have made the departure on time, but there was this, and that, and in addition we had to make sure of blah, blah, blah
Make the system as slow as it treats us badly
IT HAS TO SHOW ON STATISTICS NOT ON PPRUNE