I should measure my flight experience in cycles instead of hours, like they do for airliners
Actually, neither hours nor cycles are a measure of experience...just time and component wear. An airline pilot logs hours too...but between the experience you gain from an hour in the pattern, and the experience an airline pilot gains from an hour of monitoring automated systems at altitude in level flight...you get more experience for the hour.
Two pilots each fly an identical airplane for one hour. One drones around looking out the window, and then lands. Another flies traffic patterns, practices stalls, does ground reference maneuvers, engages in various simulated emergencies, and then lands. Which one has gained more experience in that hour? Both flew one hour, but the latter pilot came away with much more from that hour than the first. Accordingly, while one may not fly many hours, one can still make the most of them.
This is one of the most endearing traits of the private pilot. Not flying enough to feel fully proficient all the time, the private pilot often resorts to flying maneuvers and sorties dedicated to proficiency. While I might go out and fly for proficiency every six months, a fraction of the time I'm actually out there...many who fly for fun or pleasure may be doing proficiency flights all the time...the lions share of your own flying. You might say, therefore that you're getting more experience than the individual who pushes the power levers up, engages the autopilot and autothrottle, and monitors systems while the airplane does the rest.
Bottom line...don't sell yourself short. It's tough to find the money to fly, it's tough to be dedicated enough to do it. Doing it on your own, seeking your own proficiency, your own experience speaks wonders for your dedication, and it's experience not to be disregarded or lightly dismissed. You're on the right track. We all wish we could fly more. I know I do. However, we do what we can, when we can, and make the most of what we've got. Sounds to me like you're doing just that.