Being gay has only one meaning - a sexual preference for a person of the same gender. Everything else, including every prejudice, dark mental image or media-fed belief, is purely in one's mind.
Not true I'm afraid and, apart from those who chose to use their religion as a battering ram to provide their moral compass rather than their brain, it's clear there are two "sorts" of gay. There's the sort of gay I served with in the early 80's on II Squadron who was a good soldier, tough, stolid and somewhat reserved who I would chose to have fight alongside me at any time who, unfortunately, died of AIDS a few years later that was caught through unprotected homosexual activity, (RIP Tash). He was, (in forces terms), the acceptable gay.
Then there's the flamboyant, (often known as "screaming" gay), with the penchant for redecorating, who likes to touch those he talks to and invade their space while seemingly oblivious to the discomfort he causes, who delights in being subtly outrageous and, again, making those around him uncomfortable and who makes it clear to everyone that his sexuality is nothing but that he, absolutely, mustn't be made to feel different or discriminated against. He's the unacceptable gay because he uses his sexuality as a weapon to keep those around him under a level of control.
If GaiPilot were not a troll, (which I still maintain he is), he would undoubtedly fall into the latter category simply because he is already preparing himself. Tim, you sound like the former category and good on you, but you need to accept that within your "society", just like in hetero "society" that people are different and while you are clearly predisposed to show favour to "your own" and dis-favour to "us" the hetero "society" does the same but is less likely to discriminate between the various factions of what is, after all, a relatively small group, (it's easier to paint a small group with the same brush than it is to do so a larger group).