Interesting thread (ignoring all the tosh). I know someone that went to Gay Pride and realised that the lifestyle they wanted was not compatible with the Service. They left. To go the other way is interesting. I don't see why we should not recruit from all parts of society, just interesting that recruiting at what is a fairly flamboyant and in-your-face event might give people the wrong impression that every base will have a gay club.
In my experience (3 gay chums, 2 of which I would be happy to go to war with, one turned into a bit of a joke of his own making), those who get on with their jobs and are good at them are respected as such. Screaming queens tend to get frowned upon.
I don't see introducing your partner as provocation, depends how it is done. Do it the same way as everyone else is introducing wives/girlfriends (don't rush to the front) and if Mrs Staish takes offence then she is not worth knowing.
IMO.