In Hassi Messaud, Algeria, just after airborne:
ATC: "ZS-ABC, what is your minimum rate of climb?"
Us: "Confirm you want our MINIMUM rate of climb?"
ATC: "yes, yes - what is your minimum rate of climb"
Us: "Our minimum rate of climb is zero fpm"
ATC: silence (apart from sound of cogs ticking)
Us: "Our maximum rate of climb is 1500 fpm, would you like us to maintain maximum rate of climb?"
ATC: "Yes please - maintain minimum rate of climb"
Us: (sigh) "Maintaining minimum rate of climb 1500 fpm"