GP,
One of the never-changing aspects of the military is this: If there is something about you that sets you apart from everybody else, you will have the piss taken out of you for it. This is an essential part of military life - banter between mates, and is one of the ways we bond as a military unit. Accept it for what it is, and give as good as you get, and you will earm respect. Don't take offence or see it as an insult. In fact, NOT receiving banter is a BAD sign!
Judging by the tone of your posts so far, the future does not bode well for you. Your choice of PPRuNe handle, for one, speaks volumes. Remember, you will be joining to serve the Service; the Service is not there to serve you. Being gay is (quite rightly in my opinion, despite the fact that I am mildly homophobic) no barrier to you joining - but if you present yourself as a 'gay pilot', rather than a pilot who just happens to be gay, you will encounter difficulty. If you are joining to push your personal agenda on the service, or to 'mix things up', you will not last very long. This is not about 'homophobia', it is about people putting their personal proclivities before their Service. Any percieved minority group who bleat on about their minority status would encounter difficulty in the same way.
Earn respect by giving 100% effort, and building professional competence. If you are a likeable chap, and get on with most people, you will be accepted regardless. If you take every available opportunity to remind people of your sexuality, and try to push your views on others, you will not. Your 'minority' status does not entitle you to automatic respect or opportunity. In addition, you need to be sensitive to others in the Service who may not accept you. The Service has been around a long time, you have not. If you start demanding that people accept you, you will not last very long. I would suggest that 'Introducing your life partner to the Stn Cdr at a mess function' would be seen as provocative, so don't do it. Just take it on the chin, as we all have to, and get on with it, and you will earn peoples' respect.
If you are as keen and dedicated as you claim, you will be an asset to the Service. I wish you the best of luck. Just don't mince, wear make-up, or drink shandy in the mess.....
