The 1 Gp Dining In Night at Waddington
With all the moaning and groaning that Pprune attracts, perhaps it’s time for a thread that might raise a few laughs and stir a few memories.
Back in the early 70’s, when Happy Hours reached that stage of the evening when all the tales of airborne derring-do had been exhausted, the bar talk often switched over to the ‘legendary’ 1 Group Dining –In Night. Those who had attended had a fund of stories, and even those that never made the function often repeated stories they had been told by those who had attended of ‘events’ that occurred. All of the following is hearsay, based on bar talk many years ago after numerous beers on all sides - I can make no guarantee whatsoever for the accuracy of any of the detail. Anyway, from what I can remember of the ‘tall’ tales, events went something like this:
It was the height of the ‘V’ force and a misguided AOC 1 Group decided it would be an outstanding idea to have a 1 Group Dining-In Night at Waddington to which as many V force aircrew as possible would be ‘invited’ to attend. This function would celebrate the success of the V Force and allow the AOC to wallow in the unadulterated praise of his troops and amass bags of smartie points with the wheels from HQ Bomber Command and MOD. Given the size of the V Force in those days the numbers involved were huge and so a special working group was set up well in advance to organise the whole event and ensure everything went with ‘military precision’.
As the great day approached, the area surrounding the Officers Mess at Waddington was transformed by a vast series of interconnected marquees in which the dinner would be held. A vast ‘Op Order’ was duly dispatched to all the V Bomber units, giving everyone the fine detail of the great event. This detail even included the times for all the coaches to leave the units, ensuring they all eventually arrived at approximately the same time.
The great day dawned and the blokes, given this early example of excessive micro-management, had decided to make some alternative refreshment arrangements for the coach journeys to ensure nobody suffered from dehydration during the journey to Waddington. So at the appointed time the coaches filled up and everyone began to get stuck into the beer crates that had been stacked on board. Also, emotions were running high in the V Force at the time, particularly as far as the rear crew were concerned. The designers of the V Bombers had decided not to provide the rear crew with ejector seats. The folly of this decision was starting to be felt following the crash of a Vulcan at Heathrow as it attempted to land after a world tour. The two pilots managed to eject, but the 3 crew in the rear died. The actual co-pilot was one of those who died in the back. One of the pilots who survived was a WW2 hero who was now a 3* and, as AOC Bomber Command, had decided to join the crew for the final leg. The 3* was attending the dinner as the Guest of Honour – all of the highly combustible elements were in place.
At 1930hrs the coaches began to arrive at Waddington with most of the occupants already ‘tired and emotional’ after the journey. Pre-dinner drinks only exacerbated an already volatile situation. Eventually everyone was summoned into this vast marquee, grace was said and the dinner began. From that point on things went downhill at an ever-accelerating pace. The sound system was an early victim of sabotage. The marquee itself was so vast that many of the legs could barely see the top table and, with no audible direction from on high, decided to take events into their own hands. Food was largely ignored as more and more wine, beer and spirits that had been smuggled in were consumed. Before long various altercations broke out between squadrons or individuals as old scores were settled. The stakes were soon raised as individuals began seeing who dared sabotage the most supporting elements of the marquee, interfering with the activities of some other sports enthusiasts who had begun sliding down the outside.
The top table did their best to regain control of events, but the sheer scale of the function meant that, rather like a forest fire, as soon as one element was damped down, the fire would suddenly spring up elsewhere. It was decided to curtail the event as rapidly as possible with a rousing speech from the 3*, however, the sight of him rising to his feet was the final straw and complete bedlam broke out as food and various other items flew in the direction of the top table. A general food fight ensued. It was at this point that certain individuals cut the final supporting ropes on parts of the marquee. By common consent it was decided that the dinner was over and everyone began attempting to exit the marquee with more elements of it collapsing all the time.
Outside some enterprising wags had made an early exit. Making the most productive use of their time, they had found a fire hose, looped it through as many coaches as possible and waited in ambush. As people began streaming out of the collapsing marquee, the fire hose was turned on and aimed in their general direction. However, powerful fire hoses develop a mind of their own and as their prank had had the desired initial effect, the wags decided it was best to leg it. Free of any restraint whatsoever, the abandoned fire hose then proceeded to lash around in every direction, despite the best efforts of one or two game career officers who made valiant, but ultimately self-defeating, efforts to bring it under control. Little did they know that the resourceful and intelligent wags had also gone to the trouble of sabotaging the water control after they had turned the hose on. Eventually, after all sorts of mayhem, everyone dispersed back onto the coaches and disappeared off into the night, including a large group of wet and very p***ed off VIPs.
Retribution was required and heads must roll following such a fiasco. But the sheer scale of events, the numbers involved and the difficulty of identifying individual culprits, created unique difficulties. Finally it was decided that all those that attended would have a hat on, stand-up bollicking from their Stn Cdr, regardless of their involvement in certain activities or otherwise. The bollickings were duly administered and recorded in their next F1369. Since this historic function, the RAF has attempted to draw a discrete veil over the events that occurred that night at Waddington. You might find a slight reference to it in the odd book on the V Force, but nothing of substance - perhaps understandably. No doubt someone was ordered to conduct a enquiry and all the gory details must be in an aging file, gathering dust in the bowels of Main Building – most likely it’s already been shredded.
Well, that’s what I remember hearing from various sources about the 1 Gp Dining-In Night. Out there somewhere there must be Pprune readers who actually attended the event and can add their personal experiences of what happened. I know it’s not directly about flying as such, but it is a part of RAF History and it, and other ‘exuberant’ events that got out of hand, should be recorded for posterity and the amusement of others - provided no names are used. I also remember hearing stories about an Officers Mess in the Middle East that was actually burnt down following a rather over-exuberant Dining-In Night. The Stn Cdr, a distinguished Irishman of great renown, simply told the Mess Manager to charge the cost to his Mess Bill – but perhaps that’s another thread for the future. What chance another 1 Group Dining-In Night? – I think not!