Many years ago in Belize we were carrying the AOC plus party of assorted Squadron Leaders including one WRAF.
Scouser crewman went out to oversee the start but his long lead was u/s so we used hand signals.
As he climbed into the jump seat and plugged into the intercom he declared "Some c*unt down the back has farted!"
As I dug him hard in the ribs I pointed out the following message already written on my kneepad "AOC on intercom!!"
A loud voice down the back boomed "Well it wasn't me!!"
Crewman unable to speak for rest of flight...
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Fly Safely - or it might be me you hit.