Great! Really enjoyed the weekend's crop - must be the beer 'cos it can't be the weather that brought you out in droves!
Went to a Dining-in Night once - Can't remember which decade but very vaguely remember that 9 of us got there in a Ford Popular. When it got to the speeches at the end, we were dining-out about 8 million people and the 'Staish' (Yuk! Yoof-speak!!) was meticulous about giving each his/her 5 minutes of 'stroking' so, by the time the reply was delivered, all present well and truly 'bladder-wracked'.
Reply delivered by a 'retiree' who, after 35 years service, wished to relive every moment with us on his last night in the 'Mob'. After about 20 minutes, having reached the Korean War, he was forced to pause for breath. Into the (temporary) silence, a Wee Small Voice from the bottom of one of the tables crashed with:
'Oh God! Why doesn't the old fa%t shut up. I'm desperate for a p*ss!'
(The 'Staish') 'Whoever said that - in my office 0800 tomorrow morning!'
[Wee Small Voice'] 'Thanks for the offer, Sir, but I need to go now!'