Mostly in Angola.....some of my experiences.....
- You wonder why you were shot at by the local police and get told that you were driving down a one way street. Street signs? Nada
- You get pulled over by the cops at two in the morning and the competition is to see who is more pissed the cop or you....
- You are stopped by a 10 year old kid wielding an assortment of weapons who demands "Cigaro" from you...and you think he shouldn't be smoking at his age!!!
- You get told not to walk off the paved surface at an airport including the "International" one as it's mined.
- You rescue a whole lot of 'UN' personnel in your Kingair that has room for 10 or so...and you end up taking out 18
- You leave an airstrip the day before Christmas with 20 or people in your Grand Van as noone wants to stay in the war ravaged town over this time.And you get pressured to take more!
- The UN forgets to tell you that there is a battle going on at the airfield of intended landing. You fly overhead in your van to witness full scale 'war' and artilllery shaking the van from its rivets! Thanks guys!
- You hear of a UN C130 doing a spiral decent only to have 50 rounds put in it from soldiers on parade asdjacent to the airstrip...!!!!
- You spiral decend your Kingair into Saurimo only to have an Antonov 32 suddenly fill your windshield. Radio calls....what radio calls!
- You sit on the tarmac for two hours due to imminent landing of VIP then get told the VIP has not even left his point of departure yet...aaargh!
-The security guard employed to guard your house can sell you an assortment of weapons for $100
- Tracer bullets fill the night sky whilst on final approach into Luanda at night....
- At one of the outstations you get told that a braai is being prepared and whilst braaing what looked like meat you get told that the pig you are about to eat was slaughtered just behind you and the goat met his end where you were standing. Not a meter or so away from the braai
- You pay $500 to turn the runway lights on and $500 to turn them off again...
- You walk through the streets of Kinshasa (crazy!!) with your jeans around your neck as they're slightly wet and get acosted by a local cop demanding why you have no clothes on. You go around the corner to witness street kids with less clothes on than you have!
- Kids begging at your aircraft with both engines running.
- Russian Ilushyians flying the wrong way round in the holding pattern and then stating that you were in the wrong.
- Walk into an IL76 to pay crew their salaries and get offered Vodka to drink 1 hour before they and yourself are scheduled to fly.
- Your UN rep on the ground sells tickets for your flight to non UN affiliated locals because he can.
- UN staff in the city get danger pay for sitting in an office. You have to visit war ravaged towns with not even a flak jacket!!!!
- Calved up goats horses and pigs lie next to your aircraft wating to get loaded. You say no to the loading and a boxing match ensues.
- Half the bags you load into your 'Executive' Kingair stink of fish. You yell 'Nao Peche nao peche" and wonder why they look at you in total amazement!