Ha ha Beags. Remember that one!
When you're half way through IOT and your girlfriend dumps you just before the mid course function, don't make the mistake of inviting a female freind who happens to be just a friend (honest!) because she's actually a lesbian. And she turns up wearing an outfit that looks like a pair of Arabic pyjamas, downs pint's of John Smith's faster than your mates, tells dirty jokes that would make Jim Davidson blush, then make a pass at your female flight commander because she's mistaken her for a fellow carpet licker (she wasn't).
(Didn't invite anyone on the subsequent course.)