Thanks for the tip-offs years ago about the Dumbarton dummies and their 'call dumping' ploy to increase revenue, Roly!
It did amuse me to try to call OC101 once, only to be told he didn't exist...
He was most amused when I told him.
Ah - the good old days at Brawdy (1975-6) when the phones didn't even have dials. You just picked up the phone and some aged Druid connected you to the appropriate extension.
Remember when cross-country calls involved a series of progressively fainter old biddies chatting to eachother ("Central...click, click, Rothwell Haigh please, dear...click, click...Machrihanish please....click, click...."Hullooo, RAF Machrihanish here....")? And the occasional screech of "ARE YOU WORKING??!!" if you dared to pause for thought in mid-call!
A mate using this system once got pissed off when it well went dead "Ah f*ck it, the bastard telephone's gone t*ts up. Bolleaux!" he muttered to no-one in particular, only to be chastised by some vexed harpy who retorted "There's no call for language like that, young man, I'm trying to connect you!".
Dial-a-mate worked fine in the 80s and 90s. But getting rid of station operators in favour of failed burger-flippers at call centres proved a total disaster.
Thank heavens for cellphones!