Awful, awful service of the absolute lowest order....
My personal favourite:
Me - "Can you put me through to HMS Raleigh Wardroom please?"
Op - "She's at sea"
Me - "that's surprising... she's a shore establishment"
Even more infuriating is trying to contact a ship at sea from a civvy line. It's almost impossible. A tip for anyone needing to do this though - call the Whitehall operator. They'll do it for you.