Whirls/ShyT - hope you still have your sense of humour......
Paddy the Englishman, Paddy the Scotsman and Paddy the Irishman were each granted a wish by a genie. Paddy the Scotsman quickly declared that he wished all the land in Scotland to remain fertile forever. It was done in an instant. Paddy the Englishman was well impressed and responded by wishing for a wall around England to keep everything foreign out. In a flash, a great wall appeared around England.
Paddy the Irishman thought about this and asked, “Tell me more about that wall!”
So the genie said, “It’s 5000ft thick, 5,000ft tall, nothing gets in or out!”
Paddy the Irishman lay back, carefully lit a Hamlet and said - “Fill the bugger with water!”
Life jackets under the seat and all that.......!! 
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