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Old 30th November 2000 | 02:12
  #11 (permalink)  
Grandad Flyer
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I have just 2 things to say.

Don't drink and fly - you'll spill the beer, and think of the weight and balance element of the case of beer on the back seat.

Buy an Airbus, they come with 3 free cup holders up front and a handy table for eating your lunch on. Only problem then is when you get into moderate or severe turbulence, if you have a full cup of coffee you can pretty much guarantee that by the time the turbulence stops you will only have half a cup of coffee and some soggy manuals/maps/flight plan.
However, I have found a solution. Always have a spare cup with every cup of coffee. When the turbulence starts, when at its light phase, pour half the cup of coffee into the spare cup whilst balancing the cups between your legs (needs table put away first). Then hold one cup in each hand. This works really well right up to the point where you hit the really severe turbulence. At the point where the loud noise goes off and the autopilot light flashes at you, you probably should call a flight attendant as when that loud noise goes off it means no-one is flying the aeroplane. In severe turbulence this can really spoil your day.


PS. You are obvious not a real serious pilot if you drink tea with mile and sugar and in a cup with a saucer. Real pilots only use mugs and always drink coffee.