All this reminds me of an e-mail funny received recently. The following are allegedly genuine court recordings:
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed. .on dead people?. .A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?. .A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.. .Q: And Mr.. Dennington was dead at the time?. .A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering. .why I was doing an autopsy.
. .Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy,. .did you check for a pulse?. .A: No.. .Q: Did you check for blood pressure?. .A: No.. .Q: Did you check for breathing?. .A: No.. .Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was. .alive when you began the autopsy?. .A: No.. .Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?. .A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.. .Q: But could the patient have still been alive,. .nevertheless?. .A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been. .alive and practicing law somewhere.
[ 26 February 2002: Message edited by: Capt. Horrendous ]</p>