Hi Big Eddie,
You are obviously in a differcult dilema,
The previous post suggesting the GAPAN test is a very good idea
Notice you are in Portsmouth, I'm training over at BCFT in Bournemouth, whilst I would highly recommend them as a full modular training provider,
I would however, givern your current situation, suggest that you may want to do a trial flight with one of the instructors over at Old Sarum, (Salisbury), David Scoles is the top man and is very very good. I have been up with a few of the other instructors and they are very experienced, and I believe will give you very honest feedback on you flying skills / aptitude. I have never found that they would flatter anyone just to grab your money.
Recommend you be very honest with them as to your situation, they will listern with compassion, but give you a very dispassion assessment back.
If they think you are up to the challenges, and you like them, you could do a lot worse for a PPL training FTO
and there relatively cheap
good luck
Fran