Just a couple from the other side of the pond though not as hilarious as some of "yours".....
While in recruit training one of my instructors who had been drafted in from the army decided he wanted us out of DPM's and back on the square in No.1's post haste..."Im givin you a minute to get back here in yer No.1s...100,99,98,97...."
A British Army Gazzelle put down in a barracks on the wrong side of the border and the M.P on duty was quoted as saying to the camp commander "Sir, Ive locked the gates, theres no way they're gettin outta here tnite!!"
