The letter writer professes to be well-educated and well-spoken (if you are you need not say so, the letter should create the impression for you). He undoes any possibility of this by using all caps, rambling and making grammatical errors (one woman is a womAn, more than one is womEn).
Rants just make you look like a lunatic, even when you have a legitimate case. Also, not making a point to get the employees' names is a big mistake and undermines your case.