PA,
Sounds like you've tried all the books. Perhaps try an IFR instructor. Maybe kill two birds with one wizzwheel. If you havn't chosen a flying school, perhaps shop around and see if you can get some time with prospective instructors. Get a feel for their abilities before you start turning props at +$300 per hour. Find a good instructor and you'll get answers, undertsanding of the topic and assurance your with the right guy/girl for the flying phase. In my old experience as an IFR G1, often problems had a common root cause that an instructor will be able to isolate and explain. Even paying for an hour or two of their time for a dedicated briefing would be cheaper than this book+that book etc.
When the penny drops it will all fit into place.
DT