I think we all sympathise those with a GENUINE problem that has been brought upon them without them doing anything to deserve it nor to encourage it and have no recourse/medication/solution available to them inregards to their issue. But at the same time there are a lot of people who have brought these issues upon themselves and then complain when they aren't taken care of.
In cases like VanderAJ i'm sure that when you call to make your booking you make them aware of your wifes need of a wheelchair and as such they can go about doing what needs to be done to accomodate you. The problem is when people just turn up and EXPECT there not to be a problem. They have not considered there to be an issue whatsoever, whether because they simply could not have considered it, don't care, or couldn't be bothered to think of such things, in any case its extra effort for the airlines and extra costs that have to passed onto other passengers. For those who are carrying a little extra weight perhaps informing the person you make the booking with or contacting the airline could simply and effectively curtail anything like this happening in the first place!!
In the end though a lot of these problems come from paxs who think the world revolves around them, personally i've worked as a helo loader and in the restaurant industry (Now training to be a pilot) so i've had to deal with this a lot, obvious issues that we should have been informed of but weren't, someone turning up with a wheelchair for a restaurant booking thinking that it would cause no issue whatsoever... we have to consider how to get them in, where to seat them so as not to cause disruption etc... when they come in as such and EXPECT us to ready for it, it really annoys me. Same with larger passengers on helos, they turn up and for some reason think that their 170kg is going to be of no concern for a helo and then get annoyed when we have to wait for a relatively free helo to take them where they are going, thats not our fault!! If informed before hand in these sorts of cases a lot of annoyances for us and the customer can be avoided altogether.
Think about that next time your a pax booking for a flight or going out somewhere, think before you ring up if there are going to be any extenuating circumstances AND FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TELL THEM!! 9/10 times they are more than happy to try and accomodate you because your a paying customer, but just rock up and expect everything to be perfectly fine when you haven't informed them of some sort of issue and you'd also better expect there to be a lot of hassle involved.