In a low powered ac you can turn down wind before hitting circuit height to keep it tight. Make sure its a 15 - 20deg climbing turn.
As for landing don't throw height away early, you may need it if the eng fails. You can do a glide approach from the base turn. That is as tight as it needs to be. The theory with the circuit is you should be able to glide to the field from downwind if the engine fails...
Other options are to negotiate a lower circuit height (microlights use 500, why can't aeroplanes?)
Of course you need to follow everyone else so if they are flying big ones then so do you. A sneaky option is to ask for an orbit on downwind if it looks like the final approach will be at 3 miles (providing no-one is behind you). I also knew someone who used to climb on downwind if it looked like it was going to be a long final due to ac ahead doing long finals in order to keep in gliding range of the field.
Ideally everyone would fly super tight RAF circuits but they don't. Welcome to civil aviation.