Sorry to hear that you didn't make it through. I didn't see your original post asking for advice but this post was quite interesting.
As to what advice, I am sure that just about everyone out there would be able to offer some ranging from "keep trying" to "give it away" depending on their point of view.
If you want to join the military and want to fly then consider joining the RAAF as a Nav or the Navy as an Observer. You get plenty of flying in some pretty decent aeroplanes (Orion, F-111, Hercules, Seahawk etc) but you would have to accept the idea that you wouldn't be at the controls. You do get to do plenty of other stuff which is pretty good eg: the Tacco more or less runs the mission on the Orion. On any of the ADF's types you will get paid pretty well, get to travel around and work as part of a team (sounds like a recruiting blurb, I know, but is essentially true).
Of course, if your plan is to join as a Nav/Obs and re-role to the Pilot category then be careful. If you have failed basic apptitude for Pilot then the RAAF can be reluctant to reassess you. I know a couple of blokes who have been Navs and have subsequently become Pilots but in both cases I think they tested well enough for Pilot but were told "we have no spots for Pilot at the moment, would you like to become a Nav and maybe transfer later?"
As for other categories, such as Air Defence Officer, you get all of the benefits of being in the Service, but you don't get to fly. If you like being airborne then don't go for AirDefendo. Of course, you can always transfer to aircrew at a later date, if that is what you want, but why not, if you really want to be aircrew, go straight to Nav?
As for going civvy and trying again later that is what I ended up doing. I passed the Pilot apptitude on my first go but was regarded as "not mature enough" by the psych. (some who know me would argue nothing has changed <img src="smile.gif" border="0"> ) I kept on going back and annoying them until they would take me. It worked in the end.