VH, I recall some discussion with you a year or two ago about your Missus. I'm sorry to hear of the ultimate outcome. You have some very valid points to raise.
I don't know the answer to our health "system" failures these days. Your UK system is perhaps overly bureaucratised. But our US system has so many impediments to getting proper care, that it seems only flinging loads of cash around seems to get results.
We have to keep in mind the old "macro- versus micro-" issue. We need planners and academics who can look at the overall situation and say, for example "we'll advise screening for Disease X because the testing and overall outcome results justify the cost. We won't screen for Disease Y because we don't have an effective screening plan that is effective and affordable". Example: Cervical cancer is X, ovarian cancer is Y.
However, at the micro- level, we have to evaluate and treat the individual. So sometimes that plan for Disease X lets us down and does not work, and sometimes we need to look at screening for Disease Y in a particular person because they have individual differences in their case.
How to balance these is the great unknown in health care today. And it is true in every country's systems.
Best wishes to you and your family, VH.
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Graham MD