Pull up a sandbag ~ "I remember when..

[Al R]

• There being no escape from the heat or cold.
• Me and MicK sleeping out at -29 to trial new sleeping bags for (as was) SCRDE.
• The smell of gently heating spilt Keo.
• Limassol wine festivals.. all you can drink for £2.
• The awful cloying smell of Kokkers the next morning.
• Forgetting all of that 10 hours later.
• Wittering village when it had a petrol station!! Grr.
• Sneaking something into the pile of papers in Central Registry when SROs used to be stapled by hand, asking for volunteers to apply for duties as a houseboy in the COs house. Male only applicants were asked to have ".. a cheeky smile, a nice bott and be willing to stay for sleepovers in the event of late entertaining". The **** really hit the roof over that one. Doing the same asking for volunteers to trial out sharing spare rooms in MQs when the blocks were full and explaining to Scalies that rooms would be requisitioned and recompense at the MoD war scaling contingency scale of £1.50 (or something) would be granted. Yes, Mr RAFP.. it was me.
• Over the course of an 8 day OP, carving a spendid hunting scene (with horses and hounds) into the (spare) wooden stock of my SLR and telling the army that we were positively encouraged to personalise our kit.
• being aghast when said squaddie told me the next month at the same handover that he had handed his papers in to rebadge.
• Yamma Clark falling asleep and us clipping a swastika into the crown of his head. Him not realising until (WO) Brian Deeley saw it. He was made to wear a tin helmet everywhere until it grew back (he wasn't allowed to shave his head because of the sun).
• Brian Deeley telling is he was going to run for Mayor of Chipnam and ban the RAF Regiment from town. He died a couple of years after leaving.
• Brian Deeley banning me from EVERY single trading establishment whether it be a pub or shop on the island of Cyprus, with the exception of Tip Top toyshop in town. I liked him.
• C Flt sitting on the fuselage of a Lightning and being told off.
• Covertly mounting an OP once and every night, at 2330, being treated to a bird stripping off with curtains wide open.
• A WRAF interpreter TELLING me that she didn't join up 'for this kind of ****' when being told (in N Bosnia) to get a grip and clean her rifle.
• Her limp wristed gimp of a boss having a go at me for telling her to get a grip and telling me that she was a 'really good girl' who's job was to interprete, and not play 'silly military buggers'.
• The battle group commander sacking both of them .
• Working with the Cav.. always a pleasure.
• Calling a Cav Cpl of the Horse 'bud'.
• Military field cooking, unsurpassed anywhere. I don't know why a few of them don't get together and start a good old fashioned nosh house selling quality beer and show food. Theme it, buy a load of 12x12s and make it an experience.
• A Guards officer having a go at the Regt in Brunei, and promptly ND'ing a life round into his foot.
• STICKY CHOCY PUDDING AT CATTERICK. (swoon)
• When the first WRAF was posted into Catterick.
• Running the Recce Section and Budgie and mounting an Action Man on the front of one of the stripped down Landies. Budgie named him Recon Ron. The lads found a Barbie doll for the other wagon and she was named Recce Beckie. If you look closely, in the sqn fot, you can see Ron and Beckie getting down to it in a most imaginative position.
• All in Stew.
• The STINK from the BVs in the back of the armour. That boiled water could ever smell so bad is still beyond my comprehension.