Last couple... it's late!
Gulf 1..
It took a while to get the message back home that alcohol smuggled into parcels in empty shampoo bottles tasted entirely of....shampoo :o(
Method number 2. The accompanying letter in the parcel states "The vodka is in the Wet Wipes".
No problem! A giggling group of pilots is observed carefully wringing out wet wipes & getting comfortably tipsy on the juice.
They sobered up rapidly when removal of the last Wet Wipe revealed a minature of vodka secreted in the bottom of the empty tub!!!
And...
The chalet full of curious pilots testing their newly issued REAL combo pens on an orange to shouts of "Christ look at the size of that needle!"
After half a dozen shots they drift off to bed leaving the nerve-agent proof orange on the table.
A late returnee spies the juicy orange & helps himself. Was found wandering around commenting "Bright in here isn't it!!"
...& I don't think anyone will forget the first night time panic when the Scud alarms went off. In the OC's chalet someone found the light switch... & revealed the OC trying desperately to get an NBC boot on his head.