The cigarette thing is old news - happened over a year ago
AFAIK. I seem to recall some threatening piece of paper from Turd Towers reminding us all not to mess with HM customs.
As for the S/Os and the LHR lovelies - don't think other ranks haven't been there and done that, as I hear it.
About sending some legal people to LHR, it probably would take management that long to get organised.