Hi Roboto,
Well you certainly don't sound happy. On the other hand you have obviously progressed to a certain point in an aviation career. My father was I am and my son is. We all did it by different routes and in each case I would say that a degree of grunt work was done ie crap jobs in pisspoor locations flying junky old aircraft. We all managed to progress to the airlines and fly nice modern aircraft. I have learned that being in the right place at the right time is a definite rule that applies and you cannot swot for that one. I hate to say but luck does play a part, along with persistance diligence and the right attitude. I'd definitely drop the colour idea that's a non starter and in your case a bad card to even hint at playing. Take your lumps, everybody gets them, keep at it. It really is a great profession and the law of averages generaly means that everybody gets a break at some stage, some later than others. And yes lots of people do start by instructing and towing banners flying mail oilfield support, charter, exec and funnily enough it can be pretty rewarding in it's own sweaty way. Been there seen it and enjoyed it