Sounds like a stressful day.
Q1 - my feeling is that in an emergency until I am relatively safe, I wouldn't be worrying too much about whether or not I can clear the active. As you point out, directional control with a dead wheel isn't too great, so why add risk to the situation by trying to steer the thing to a 'place of convenience' if you have a nice wide, safe, obstacle free piece of tarmac to come to rest on?
Q2 - I wouldn't feel forced to make a landing ever - a go-around is almost always a safer option if you are not comfortable with the approach. Other aircraft entering the circuit should be using established procedures which give you enough clearance to execute a go-around, notwithstanding the need to still keep the eyes peeled as per normal operations. I always worry that I am not visual with traffic in the circuit, but I figure if I keep my lookout good (up and down as well as horizontally!), clear all my turns and ensure proper spacing and circuit size and procedures, I have a good chance of taking timely evasive action in the worst case. Don't forget there is always the chance of someone in the circuit non-radio, so just because you can't hear them, doesn't mean they're not there.
A