afterburner2
they work in ships - bit like the QEII but smaller
they live in bunks - bit like a cabin but smaller
they fly 'aewoplanes' - bit like a jumbo-jet but smaller
they get 'alluyances' - bit like a 'wodge' but smaller
the wife lives in a quarter - bit like a house but smaller, and it's onshore!
and they sail off to that place where the Buckie fishing boats go, except it might be a bit warmer - and for a bit longer.
They might work 9 til 5 - thats September til May
re-read last years collection of 'The Sun' - over and over again - til 7
dine in the wardrobe, sing at 'toophers' and play 'wugby' til 11
jump into somebody elses bed at bedtime, and 'wite' letters to wifeys, anybodys wifey.
They have 'bwekfast' and are 'weddy' for work by 8 bells, 'bweef' till 8.30 and take off again at 9.
They 'fwy awound and awound' in circles till 'lonch', offering joy rides to the girlies and taking in the spectacular sights of the sea and - err.. more sea.
In the afternoon they might load up with a few 'bewits and bombs' and blow the cr*p out of - err.. the sea, and if any bad boys approach they'll do a 'wunner' to mother, unless they fancy trying to sell a few 'heewo' stories to the 'pwess' for a few bob.
That's about it 'weely'. - All jolly good fun, far better than having to look after a bunch of obnoxious holiday makers and worrying about arriving on time.
Oh, I nearly forgot, your wife could join up and go to sea aswell, but not on the same ship, and if you have kids - not at the same time. So you could have 6 months at home every year, unfortunately, she won't be there.
There is good news however, she might get alot more 'dosh' for her 'heewo' stories.
