As you can see, you also need an odd sense of humour to be a B1 or B2 licensed guy.
Basically, they're right. It takes a long time and a lot of effort to qualify. You're better off doing it the traditional way - get into debt to buy your frozen ATPL, then work your way through the !!!!! jobs until you get the one you really want - which isn't necessarily a long-haul airline job.
If I was twenty years younger, I'd still be an old fart, but if I was forty years younger I'd try for the pilot route directly. The work you've already done won't be wasted
irishwhale, it will be very useful during the ground studies.