If he is ex-serving but has a TELIC gong, he must be fairly recent of this parish. Depending how cruel you want to be, you could always knock up a re-call notice, informing him that a re-called to duty as part of the reserves is in the offing for a lot of people and will likely be going to Afghanistan.
You could always back it up with some paperwork - maybe a bodged photoshopped newspaper article, some internet cuttings, a made up letter saying you have to report for trg etc and he will prob get his in a couple of weeks time etc to ram it home that bit harder. Watch his reaction as he is faced with the prospect of actually having to go and do something to earn his gongs.
A simple det to the Stan shouldn't be a problem for someone with a chestfull of op medals and an MBE to boot. ...... Or am I being a bit too cruel here?