To be paid? In the UK? You'll need to undergo at least the CPL theory (or ATPL though overkill will do). This will probably take oooh six months distnace-learning? £1600ish. Less perhaps if you can find somewhere who will do so full-time. £60 per exam.
At least four weeks (allowing for weather) for the practical CPL flying, where you should unearn all those bad habits. Anywhere between £5000-7000 for a SE-CPL. Then another 4 weeks and £5000 for a FI(R) perhaps. A small selection of schools (I said small) may turn you away without an IR.
Beyond that, you can either go the microlight route where it seems the pay is better and the entry requirements are less onerous, or emigrate.