I appreciate this a/c is not commonly used within the uk, it is mainly operated by the greeks, turkish and swedish (although it is US made!)... If your not familiar with it, the aft jump seat is forward facing on the aft entrance door (very rear of the a/c, centre of the a/c looking down the aisle!) the airstairs actually drop from the tailcone of it... the aft toilets are left and right of this door, at the very rear, and the aft galley is situated a/c left behind row 28 to about row 32 ish (it's not big!)... looking rear there is a 'lavatory occupied' sign placed on the bulkhead of the aft galley a/c left, to give the pax a heads up!, however... at least 10 x per sector...
"Toilet sir/madam??? at the very back!!!!"
Seeing people pushing the bulkhead thinking a door will pop open out of no where does make me chuckle!!!!
Safety Demo... CC at row 1, row 23(o/wings) and row 31 (side of the rear galley to show the last 2 rows) lady at row 30....
Excuse me... I couldn't see any of that! I think you should have somebody stood just here!
Me... Did you hear the announcement madam???
PAX... not really, I was trying to find my Mints for take off...
Me... Ok Madam... bare with me!
(at this point I completed the safety demo myself, just for this pax alone, and asked loudly... did you see it that time Madam???) She was a little flushed in the cheeks but hey, if you can't be bothered to pay attention, then don't complain!!!!
As for a/c problems...let's just say after an engine failure in DLM, I have benn taken to the transit lounge by ground staff to explain to PAX why we need minimum rest (165 people shouting at you is not fun
)
And I've been lost over German airspace with no autopilot, no anticollision systems and no weather guidance (don't know the technical term) a 3hr flight from KLX took 5 hrs! had to be escorted back to home territory by fighter planes, the ground agents were taking the michael when we got back due to ("flightno"... where are you?, "flightno", please respond!")
I've only been flyin for 6 months, already learned 3 AOC's, had many a Medical Emergency, a 10 minute decent (ok, I appreciate on a smaller a/c this is acceptable.. but 2 minutes later a Thomsonfly 75 had to perform a go-around cos it couldn't stop in time) twin engine failure, manual landing while sat in the f/d with the f/o shouting sh
t, sh
t, sh
t! all the way down. 2 Cpts arguing cos one was 74 trained and it was ok to land with 3 white lights (MD83.. not advisable), a burst tyre on landing... Oh and David Bellamy on one of my flights (looking more and more like santa everyday!) Am I jinxed do ya think? Should I give it up as a bad Job??? I'm starting with Silverjet in a month... No liquids on board my flight I tell ya!
