why dont you switch to a 152, cheaper to fly so more hours for your book. I happen to know that Elstree have a superb 152 fully equipped that is cheaper to fly. I sold them my 152!
My friend just got a job with BA flying Dash. He spent the first 100hrs hanging onto the aircraft by the tailplane he was so far behind it. You are no different in this respect.
I think you are pushing yourself to hard and just making things more diificult for yourself. Chill out....