DutchRoll,
Yes the story about your old man is appaling, and the security people involved in that instance should be sacked.
I am sure there are a million other 'passenger stories' similar or worse than that - unfortunately.
The discussion here involves aircrew and screening. I think think the mojority of the screening people are just doing their job. I agree some of them have a chip on their shoulder about something - but so do lots of pilots. Refusing to take your shoes off, or whatever, is just raising your blood pressure, and is only doing yourself harm.
Take your shoes off, move through, and put them back on again. How hard is that really?