KYGMSY
I don't think that the crews intend any insult to your professionalism by asking these questions.
The flight deck culture of challenge and response via the checklist encourages an atmosphere where crewmembers can query another crewmembers actions without it being seen as an insult. I have no problem with the F/O (or the dispatcher) asking me if I have remembered to do something, because I am not perfect (and getting less so with advancing years), and that question might, one day, save my life. It is vital for everyones safety that we all work as a team. I have spent several days 'shadowing' our dispatchers so that I can understand their problems. I suggest that you try to fix up some jump-seat flights so that you can see the other side of the story.
Best Wishes
Airclues