Alan M
Your JOB is service provision, which you chose to do; so what if someones hobby is flying? A very large number of passengers today are only flying for leisure purposes.
Somehow I think that if there were a CRM type of requirement for controllers to demonstrate how much they enjoyed providing a service and went the extra mile to provide constructive assistance and advice you wouldn't score too highly. It is NOT your airspace - it is airspace that you have custodianship of on behalf of ALL airspace users and you should apply your skills equitably for the benefit of ALL airspace users.
I fully understand the stress you perceive that you are under - but if you do not have the staffing to provide the required service then maybe you should direct your feelings towards your employer. I wonder how much it might affect your conscience if a refusal of service to a pilot with poor RT (as you perceive it) results in an accident or incident to that pilot. I seem to recall that the best guidance was given along the lines of 'nothing in these rules or regulations shall prevent a controller undertaking such actions as may be necessary to ensure safety'.