Whirlygig
I am pleased to inform you that you have substantially mis-speculated on the actual situation.
BIK arises through a limited company (not a partnership) owning an asset to which an employee or a director has access for personal use. That is the requirement for BIK to arise, nothing more. The person doesn't have to actually to make any use of the asset.
Some of what you wrote is common sense but unfortunately it isn't the legal position.
There are some published exemptions, some being listed on that URL I posted.