Oblaaspop,
Good question and I know where you are coming from? But that said, things are different here and I am not looking for any sympathy, just telling you where my cash goes.
My wife works part-time and a maid is not a luxury here but a necessity to help look after the kids. We used to have baby sitters and family, that option is now not available so we have to stump up the spondoolies or move the mother-in-law over (NOT!). At home I still played golf.
You could take the view that I don't need a maid and then my wife would never leave the house whilst the kids are at home. That kind of defeats the point of coming to Dubai: "Hey honey lets go to Dubai, I'll fly around the world and go out with my mates; you stay in your nice little prison with the kids until they grow up."
You could take the view that I don't need a gardener, we tried that once and the garden died over the summer. Working in 50° heat also kind of defeats the point of being here but it isn't a worry for many because most EK housing doesn't have a garden anyway! That said, in the states most people have a garden service and that sure as hell costs more than $40/mth.
You could take the view that I don't need to play golf but what else is there to do? Golf at home cost about 700 aed/mth so that 300 aed is hardly a life changing increase
So the maid at $463/mth is a necessity for my wife to work without any family or community support. The gardener costs $40/mth and the golf an extra $80 over the cost at home. I could reduce my outgoings by 11% and give my wife and myself no life, not a great trade.
I think the point I would make is that being so far from home has massive additional costs, some that you tend not to think about. We all know the phone will cost but..... Childcare with no family, 'holidays' away to see the family or so your kids escape the heat and some jobs that you just don't want to do in 50° heat. You'll see I put 'holidays' in brackets and that is because I don't view the annual traipse home, living out of a suitcase in someone else's house as a holiday. It was fine the first year but then it became a less and less enjoyable chore. As the grand parents get older they don't want to travel as much and if you want your family to stick together it will cost. It always makes me laugh that we fly the family thousands of miles to see home and so called 'friends' can't be asked to drive 30 miles to come and visit. (Yeah I know, a personal problem!)
I could save all my cash and I know a lot of guys that have a short term plan to make the cash and escape. Some do but many of them start short term and stay, ending up as miserable old gits with bigger bank accounts. I take the view that everyday here now is at least as valuable as a day I hope to see in the future. Anyway, with my luck if I saved all my cash I'd be run over by a tractor at the airport going home.
As I said before, not looking for any sympathy. But playing 'Devils Advocate' - your necessities change and.....You spend a long time dead!
Schnowzer