Gatwick Airport. Foggy at destination (Jersey)
Passenger: Why is why my flight delayed?
Me: Because of the fog Madam.
Passenger: Well I've just phoned my friend in Jersey and she says it's not that foggy and that she can see all the way to the end of her garden.
Me: Oh. Is it a big garden?
Passenger: Yes it is.
Me: Right, well tell her to pop the washing line down, put the patio lights on and we'll land there.... True story.
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Passenger: What film will be on the flight?
Me: *big sigh*
Quick witted colleague: Let's see, it's Tuesday so, Dances with wolves Sir.
Passenger: Oh, I've already seen that.
Quick witted colleague: Oh, sorry to hear that, how about Ocean's Eleven?
Passenger: No, not seen that.
Quick witted colleague: I'll get on to it straight away Sir (and picks up the phone).
Just wear a uniform into an airport and you'll soon be asked some daft questions. £10 says the first is 'Do you work here?'