C130Dreamer,
Thanks very much for all that. Very wise words.
The CFI is going to fly me next week for another view on my problems. Since my instructor has shown his true colours I don't think I can get any more value out of flying with him - I think he will only try to prove himself right about my ability, or lack of. I don't really want to go elswhere at this late stage - new a/c, area, routes, etc to get used to = more expense.
I really like the idea of the armchair flying bit - think that'll be good. And sitting in the a/c with another student to call out emergencies and the like I hadn't thought of that either - another good idea. And I'll see if I can get the sim in its downtime - should be interesting to see their expressions when I ask the question!
You're right about the test - although I don't tend to dwell on mistakes so much its the thought of being caught out that seems to get me rattled the most. But then its pressure I'm creating for myself - a sort of self-sabotaging action. Give me an audience to address and I'm fine - put me one-to-one with an examiner and it all goes pear-shaped. Reminds me of when I sat music exams a few years ago. Must have a closer look at my inner self-doubts.
Thanks again for taking the time to put your thoughts into words. I'll keep you posted.
Craggenmore,
No, my callsign is not Oxford 13! Never been near the place. You're right about my experience being a demolition job though - it certainly hurt a lot. But as someone once said, "Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent". So I'm not going to.
T.