So hopefully you now acknowledge what '535' has been saying has been a very reasoned and correct response to your initial complaint?
None of us ever stop learning, many people pay lip-service to that statement but it really is true. You've learnt a bit about ATC procedures, and our ATCO colleagues here have learnt that not every pilot in their airspace necessarily has the same understanding of those procedures as they.
Some suggestions from a fellow commercial pilot:
1) Don't assert that just because you thought it was so, that the rest of your colleagues think that way too! Some of us strive to maintain our IFR flying standards!
2) Take some of your time off to visit your local ATC unit, not just for 5 mins up the tower, but (if you can arrange it) a whole morning/afternoon shift - you will see first-hand so many of the situations which appear inexplicable from the other side of the R/T, and gain a better understanding of the airspace in which you operate and enhanced Situational Awareness next time you fly.
3) see 2). So important that I mentioned it twice. I really, really recommend it.
4) Talk to your company about offering familiarisation flights to local ATCOs - my company does, and they have a 'Tiny' BHX base - perhaps we are colleagues? If so, PM and I can explain how to arrange it. Also very useful.
Hopefully something positive can result from what appears to have been initially a negative experience for you.
All the best,
GL