Tick-tock Rock probing Guins on NBC blah (complete with killer judo-chop hand action to denote lucky victim)....
"Roight then! Wot
cullaaaaaah..<long pause> does wun cullaaaaaaaaaah deeeeetectaaaaaaah paypaaaaaaaah turn when subjected to
nerve agent?"
Long pause whilst the hand of death sweeps for a target then
pounces....
(Oh no, Cpl! I'm SO scared! Please don't pick me!
)
"......YEW!"
Killer hand fires an imaginary lighting bolt my way......
"Who me?
Oh right
Errrrrr.......I dunno but if it's only ONE colour paper, does it really matter what colour that is? If I see ANY coloured spots, we're in the dwang, right?
"
"And what if someone comes along wiv a felt tip pen? Then what?!!!!
"
"I'd shoot them for being a complete knb and compromising the integrity of our NBC defences"
Stunned silence from Tick-tock with a look of "This does not compute"
RAF Reg: Some of the RAF's most powerful fighters operate on the ground. Note:
some
The sooner someone with a big hat and a nice desk identifies CCS, IDT, IRT, HRT and all the other twatting Ts we have to chase as a load of token ass-covering hoop, the better.
For example, why spend an entire afternoon being lectured in how to light a paraffin stove (last seen in my grandfather's green house in the late 70s) and comedy exploding Tilley lamps when the first thing the same set of Tick-tock Rocks tell us when we reach the Land of Sand and those lovely rubberised tenty Nissen hut thingies, is that under no circumstances are naked lights to be used anywhere within a 500 nautical mile radius.
Logic, Rocks, ever seen them in the same room?