flatulence
I sympathise with CAT1. For the first 15 years of my career, my problem was shielded by flying with two flight-deck colleagues who smoked. At the onset of my command course, I decided that a little decorum was needed and changed my diet, cutting out the 6 pints of Guinness and 2 scotch eggs. But, having achieved command, I quickly became a perfect a***ole and adopted a"devil-may care" attitude - my co-pilot would put up with my indiscetions in return for a sector. It was about this time that I discovered the delights of ethnic cuisine, in particular, chicken vindaloo with extra garlic dal, all washed down by 6 bottles of imported Indian beer (complete with glycerine).My social life deteriorated - I assumed it was the loneliness of command!
Well, after 30 years, I automatically became a member of the Old Farts club and have tried to live up to expectations. Recently, a word to the wise, from my AME, cuased me to embark on a life-style changing route and have now given up meat and alcohol and instead eat only vegetables,beans and pulses and drink only carbonated soft drinks. The results are not immediately apparent - strange that!
So CAT1, don't take your problem too seriously and remember the old maxim - never own up to anything because "he who denied it always supplied it". Life is for living so go on have a blast!
I remember overhearing a conversation between 2 trolley-dollies, one of whom was relating how she had been stopped by the police for speeding. It would appear the the young miss had consumed two crew meals during a long duty day and was hurrying home to the comfort and safety of her own bathroom. Along the way, she had several fluctuations of the over-pressurisation valve and it being winter, had the heater on full with the windows tightly shut. She duly wound down her window as the officer approached and he unexpectedly stuck his head in hoping to catch a whiff of duty free alcohol but instead received a lungfull of one of Natures more obnoxious odours. He promptly staggered back, covering his nose and mouth with his hand and let out a muffled yell - "you'd best be on your way Miss, and be quick about it".
Aren't our policemen wonderful??!!