Enough of this silly whingeing!
There are 2 main reasons why licence issue is slow:
1. CAA staffing levels have been cut back to the bone, thanks to that mad old bat with the handbag who was PM a decade or so ago.
2. There are still an absurd number of PPL applications which contain some error or another. Logbook certified incorrectly, medical certificate not included, no ID.... This, to my mind, is the fault of the FE who conducted the PPL Skill Test. He/she demands a fee for this service, he/she should check EVERYTHING connected with the application.
The CAA's Head of Licensing is acutely aware of his department's performance with regard to licence issue and is doing everything he can to speed the process up. So please be patient, he's only trying to help you!